Monday, I spoke at a company about assertiveness in the workplace. Some takeaways here.

Madeira Tasting!


Our women’s movement is now eight years old and we are celebrating. Also, what does it mean to be assertive versus aggressive in the workplace?

A reminder that this Saturday, we celebrating!
In partnership with the NY Adventure Club, we host a private tour of Liberty Hall, Home of New Jersey’s first governor followed by a madeira tasting on the patio.

What is madeira?
A fortified wine made on the Portuguese islands, off the coast of Africa. Madeira is produced in a variety of styles ranging from dry wines which can be consumed as an aperitif to sweet wines usually consumed with dessert.

Why madeira?
Madeira was also a regular port of call for ships travelling to the East Indies. The Dutch East India Company became a regular customer, picking up large (112 gal/423 l) casks of wine known as “pipes” for their voyages to India.
During a recent restoration of Liberty Hall, belonging to William Livingston, New Jersey’s first elected governor, one of the country’s largest and rarest collections of 18th-century Madeira wine was discovered tucked away in the wine cellar. We will toast to the 8 year anniversary of LadyDrinks with a Madeira tasting just as his fellow founding fathers did after signing the Declaration of Independence.

What’s included in your ticket:

  • An overview of the historic property throughout the past three centuries
  • A private exploration of the mansion dating back to 1772 with access inside historic bedrooms, parlors, and the wine cellar
  • A closer look at the museum’s extensive collections of antiques including furniture, ceramics, textiles, toys, and tools
  • Stories of the ancestors of the Livingston and Kean families, which have included governors, U.S. Congressmen and senators, entrepreneurs, and pioneering women
  • Delicious catering by LadyDrinks member Sanketa Jain, Eat Krave Love
  • And a wine tasting of four different types of Madeira on the back patio!

See you there!
Event Sponsors
Neetu Jain and Arvind Bhandari, Cookie Cutters Haircuts for Kids-Livingston
Sanketa Jain, Eat Krave Love

As an extension of my work with LadyDrinks, I do a fair amount of public speaking at corporates and host workshops on leadership. Monday, I spoke to the Asian American Pacific Islander employee resource group at a biopharma company on the topic of assertiveness.

Sometimes, as a culture, we weren’t taught to be assertive at home and that dings us when it comes to getting what we want (and deserve) in the workplace. I spoke from my experiences as a TV business anchor who regularly reported from the floor the New York Stock Exchange, which was largely male dominated. I also spoke from my real world experience in helming a female leadership group today.  My colleague Dr. Matt Mullarkey presented from a more academic perspective with key studies on Asian cultures that shape communication styles.

Our biggest takeaway was that being assertive = win win for both sides. Being aggressive is a win for only my side.
Other takeaways

  1. Believe in your own value when negotiating
  2. Actively listen when engaging in a conversation and know your audience. Know how your audience/boss/peer likes to be engaged. Do they like alot of conversation or do they want you to get to the point?
  3. Don’t be afraid to use the power of the pause. Pauses allow you to gather your thoughts. It’s also a powerful negotiating tactic.
  4. When asking for a raise or a project promotion,  provide supporting statements and data. Write yourself bullet points if you get nervous
  5. Be clear about what you want from your career trajectory and don’t be afraid to share it. Never assume people automatically know.
  6. If you are already assertive and see others struggling to share items that are additive to a meeting, lift them up. “I know that Jill had a great point the other day on this topic. Jill why don’t you share?”

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